?

Log in

One · Thousand


MONSTER WATCH 2010

Recent Entries · Archive · Friends · Profile

* * *
What's that coming over the hill?
IT'S A SHEEP WITH A HUMAN HEAD!!


Source: http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/sheep-gives-birth-to-human-faced-lamb/story-e6freuy9-1225819071357

Personally I think that the writer of that article deserves a fucking medal for not freaking the fuck out like I am right now. If I'd been asked to write it, the headline would have been more along the lines of:



Now some of you may remember a rambling few posts I made last year about the dog-baby picture that was floating around the internet, and the fact that some scientists seem hell bent on bringing about the end of times by resurrecting the motherfucking dinosaurs by retro-engineering chickens. That's right, we're turning a thing we've been chowing down for since the dawn of the species into tanks with teeth. Way to secure our place in the food chain, dickheads.

As if that weren't bad enough, something crawled onto a beach in Panama late late year before getting stoned to death by a bunch of puffed up teens who thought they were in a horror movie:


Poor bastard. Check out those claws. T'aint natural.

Now I KNOW there's an explanation for each one. The Panama monster? Hairless Sloth freak. His mate in Montauk? Creepy decomposed raccoon. Heady the sheep? A mutant coincidence.

But what if, in my best Mulder voice, these are all but symptoms of something far greater and more disgusting.

What if our future... the future of the world boils down to a great battle between two forces... what if Dog Mutants riding Dinosaurs will battle human-headed sheep mounted on Panama Monsters.

And with the human Y chromosome crumbling as it is... the human race will be but  a meagre resistance trying to get by in a Dog Mutant/Man-Sheep world!

* * *
* * *
[User Picture]
On 16th January 2010 17:08 (UTC), frieza commented:
But who would you join forces with in an all out battle for control of the Earth?
* * *
[User Picture]
On 17th January 2010 23:13 (UTC), lady_lazarus commented:
This entire post is terrifying. THANKS FOR THE NIGHTMARES
[User Picture]
On 17th January 2010 23:34 (UTC), explodingsuns replied:
Psssh, and you claim to be dark. You ain't Goth, yo!
[User Picture]
On 17th January 2010 23:49 (UTC), lady_lazarus replied:
I haven't claimed such a thing since at least 2006
[User Picture]
On 17th January 2010 23:54 (UTC), explodingsuns replied:
We... er... we don't talk enough any more, do we?

So how do you write it off? Childish phase, or did you wake up one day with a smile on your face and an overwhelming urge to experiment with pastel colours?

Personally I don't address the issue and cunningly segue when other people look for an answer.
[User Picture]
On 18th January 2010 17:15 (UTC), lady_lazarus replied:
I still have a lot of friends who hang out with that crowd and I occasionally hit up some clubs, but I hate being labelled as just one thing, I'm far too eclectic.
On 18th January 2010 17:46 (UTC), (Anonymous) replied:
Yeah I had a touch of that, don't worry - there's a cure.

How's TO? When are you finally going to visit the big city and hang out? I know where all the best shit is now, one day with me and you'll want to live here, guaranteed.
* * *
[User Picture]
On 14th April 2010 12:26 (UTC), alicemeichi commented:
omg, post something new already! I'm tired of looking at this. :p
* * *

Previous Entry · Go Supernova! · Share · Next Entry